OSCAR
It’s Oscar night!!
It’s one of my favorite nights of the year. Back in the day I hosted my annual Oscar party (which included friends, lotsa good food and crazy evening gowns (rejects from past proms or hand me downs)) but the last couple of years things have come up so I’ve forgone my regular party and had annual Oscar date night with my cousin, Tanya, via text messaging.
She and I are all set and ready to go. Luckily, Blair went to see comedian Jeremy Hotz with my dad and brother so I don’t have to worry about him flipping the channels constantly trying to find a hockey game. Grrrrrr!! O Canada, eh?
Anyway, I’m 30 seconds away from the live broadcast.
Cheers!
PHAT with a P.H.!!
“Is It Ever Okay to Comment on Someone’s Weight?” I saw this article recently and thought I’d “weigh” in on the subject.
So, is it ever okay to comment on someone’s weight? Well, that depends. Are YOU a doctor? No? Then mind your own business!!
I grew up kinda chubby. Not really fat but definitely not thin. In high school I had several eating disorders (see: https://welcometosandyland.wordpress.com/2012/01/16/my-secret-obsession/) and slimmed down. After high school I maintained my weight for a while, then gained some and in college lost some. But it was after college that I “ballooned” up. In college I had a little accident and spent 14 weeks on crutches and then a few weeks with a cane. This, of course, hindered my exercise regime. After college, when I started dating my now ex-boyfriend and he moved in, my weight started going up. In part because I was eating differently with him. I was never a meat and potatoes type of girl, but he was so I began eating meals with him. That definitely affected my weight. Also, I was on a medication that, aside from some crazy-ass night terrors, a side affect was weight gain. It took me years, however, to realize that this medication was a factor in me packing on the pounds. I knew I had put on a ton (pun!) of weight, I just didn’t completely know why.
But here’s the thing – and it’s important – I knew I was fat. I didn’t need anyone else to point it out to me. I knew I had grown out of my college clothes. I knew I didn’t look or feel my best. I knew that my jiggly parts shouldn’t be that jiggly. Was I proud of being fat? No. Was I embarrassed of being fat? Yes. Would it have been mortifying to have someone point out the obvious, that I was overweight? You’re friggin’ right! I would like to believe that I would have been a strong enough person, emotionally, to punch a person in the face had he or she addressed my weight issue. But, the truth is I would have cried for days and days. I would have been ashamed and embarrassed.
I know people judged me. I know they still judge me. We all judge each other. It’s an unfortunate part of human nature. But, we should, as often as we can, try to put ourselves in the shoes of other people and try not to be assholes. Fat people know they’re fat. But whose business is it to comment on it? Aside from a medical professional, it’s no one’s business. It’d be like telling a person with a lisp that he/she had a lisp. You think that person doesn’t already know? Now, you’re an asshole and that person feels like a big bag of nothing because you pointed out that he/she talks funny. Dick.
Just to be clear on this….commenting on someone’s weight is different than addressing a health concern with a loved one. When I was overweight my dad would often (and kindly) tell me that I should do what I can to try and get my weight down because it’d be “harder to do when you get to be my age.”
The article I read which prompted this post (http://www.chatelaine.com/health/wellness/is-it-wrong-to-call-melissa-mccarthy-fat-or-simply-stating-the-obvious/) has film critic, Rex Reed calling actress Melissa McCarthy “tractor-sized” and a “humongous creep”. To add insult to injury, this isn’t the first time McCarthy’s weight has been the topic of discussion. But I’m not going to address that at all because I refuse to give that writer any more “celebrity.” The issue at hand for Mr. Reed should be whether or not the movie sucked (I can’t comment because I haven’t seen it – tho I want to…and I will. Up yours, Reed!) and whether or not Melissa McCarthy can act…and she can. In fact, she’s a great actress. I enjoy her. I think she’s funny and I also think she’s beautiful. Do I think she’s overweight? Who cares? I’m sure she has addressed this issue to death. Do I feel the need to make comment on her weight when discussing her performances? No. I don’t. At all. A) Because it doesn’t matter. It doesn’t affect her ability to say her lines or hit her mark. She’s a believable actress. B) Because it’s none of my business.
It’s also unfortunate that it seems to be “overweight” women who are targeted for this ridicule. It’s never “Pencil-thin” Gwyneth Paltrow or “nearly-invisible” Claire Danes (LOVE AND KISSES TO YOU BOTH!!!). And men never seem to have the same weight-watchers that their female counterparts have: Chris Farley (RIP), John Candy (RIP), John Goodman (OMG YOU RULE!).
These dudes ruled the roost. Their performances funny and dramatic and right on cue…and (rarely) (n)ever did a critic seem to be concerned with their weight or that they were “tractor-sized.”
Regardless of the gender, tho, it is never right to comment on someone’s weight. That person could be suffering from an eating disorder or the loss of a loved one or could have a medical condition or could be overweight from a condition not yet diagnosed. Or that person could just be fat because he or she is fat. And guess what. He/she is well aware of it! So, be a good person and keep your trap shut.
Cheers.
Crappy Valentine’s
In honor of this day of love and romance and all the garbage that goes with it I thought I would adorn you with my list of “Worst Romance Movies”.
1) The Object of My Affection
Jennifer Aniston and Paul Rudd….what could go wrong? Um, she’s knocked up and he’s her gay best friend whom she’s falling for. I just really wanted these two crazy kids to make it work.
2) Random Hearts
I love me some Harrison Ford (LOVE HIM!). He is always awesome but this movie sucked. Harrison and Kristin Scott Thomas had zero chemistry. Boring.
3) She’s All That
Because Freddie Prince, Jr. didn’t like Rachel Leigh Cook until she got a makeover and deemed “cool enough” to hang with. Lame.
4) Pretty Woman
Because Julia Roberts played a hooker, y’all. A hooker. That’s not very romantic.
5) Untamed Heart
I loved Christian Slater (I still love you, Christian) when I was growing up. And I was so excited to see this movie. But then Christian Slater dies and it ruined my life night. I cried all the way home from the theater. It was traumatizing. No movie is good if Christian Slater dies!
6) Mr. Wrong
Seriously??? Any guy you put in this movie with Ellen would have been “Mr. Wrong.” Big Duh!!
7) Remember Me
Okay, I loved this movie. But the crazy-ass M. Night Shymalan twist at the end will leave you stunned and uncontrollably sobbing and in awe and feeling like you just got punched in the stomach and really remembering.
8) Titanic
Again, I love this movie. It’s a classic and it was brilliant. But I hate it too because Jack and Rose are so wonderful together and you’re really pulling for those two kids and then that damn boat sinks and all those people die and Rose loses Jack but then she starts a new life and then that heartbreaking song is playing and the whole time you’re weeping……it’s so stressful. No movie should leave you feeling like you’re broken. I cried for days.
Well there you have it! My list of dreadful “romance” movies. Fortunately, The Man is working this evening and I have a 3 hour date with the gym.
Happy Valentine’s Day!
My Worst Nightmare
Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!! <- that there is me screaming.
This morning my worst nightmare came true.
We had a blizzard here in Nova Scotia this past weekend. And Monday night we had a crapload of more snow (which, BTW Mother Nature if you’re paying attention, was totally unnecessary). But yesterday is was warmer and mild and rainy. Sooo…..this morning was a slippery one.
As I was leaving the public parking lot with Angie Whoreface, heading to our respective offices, we walked onto the sidewalk about to hop onto the crosswalk. And then it happened. I slipped. I slipped and I fell and I completely wiped out. In Town. In Public. In front of early morning traffic.
In my attempt to avoid making concrete I grabbed at Angie. Partly to protest my fall and partly to bring her down with me because it seems only fair that I share my misery. But, instead ended up with my hand in her shirt. AWKWARD! At least we have the type of relationship that is based on awkward happenings.
Though Angie and I laughed thru this entire ordeal (because, in all honesty, it was pretty funny), the worst part was that it occurred in front of a beast I know from a former life. I can just imagine the kind of field day she had with this “gossip”.
Alas, I’m happy that my misfortune could provide not only them, the ‘townfolk’ a good laugh and some entertainment, you too, dear readers.
Cheers.
Bell’s Let’s Talk Day
Today, February 12 is Bell’s Let’s Talk Day. A day to bring awareness to mental health issues.
In support of this designated day Bell will donate 5¢ more to mental health for every text and long distance call by Bell and Bell Aliant customers, tweet using #BellLetsTalk and Facebook share of the Bell Let’s Talk image.
“The stigma associated with mental illness can be the biggest barrier to people getting the help they need,” said Karen Sheriff, President and CEO, Bell Aliant. “We are proud to partner in this national initiative once again, and we are encouraging our employees and our customers to participate, so together we can help raise awareness and provide much-needed assistance to the one in five Canadians impacted by mental illness.” (Bell)
The thing is, there’s no shame in having a mental health issue. And that seems to be a problem as many people are embarrassed to admit they have a mental health ‘disease’. I suffered from a major depression diagnosis for years and years and for the longest time I was embarrassed to tell anyone. I didn’t want people to know that I had to take medication to keep my mood “up” and so I wouldn’t cry for 10 hours straight a day.
Then one day I realized that hey, this disease is not a fault. It’s not something I can readily control. It’s no different than having some other type of disease. And so, with that realization I was able to overcome my fear and my embarrassment and my shame and just deal with it. And be proud of it because now I can overcome obstacles and educate people who are ignorant of mental health illnesses.
When I was in college I found a good friend of mine in a bathtub after he’d slit his wrists. He was severely depressed. Fortunately, he trudged thru that incident, spent some time in a psychiatric ward and now has a beautiful family. Unfortunately, a few weeks ago, The Man lost a good friend to suicide as a result of his depression. Some people are lucky to have others reach out to them. Some people choose to keep their illness a secret.
Mental health illnesses aren’t something you can see or touch. But you can see the people that harbour them. They have faces. They feel pain and they appreciate smiles and hugs.
So, keep this shiz in mind and if you are a Bell customer, text and tweet like CRAZY (pun!!) today.
Cheers.
PS. Just to reiterate comments I’ve made in the past, some mental health illness are beyond huggy help. Some people need serious medical and psychological intervention. If you know someone who is seriously ‘mental’ and you have an inclination (even just an offbeat comment) that he/she may hurt him/herself or someone else, you have the obligation to report this person to an authority figure or to at least someone who will take you seriously.
And Dear God, to avoid another Sandy Hook or Aurora theatre or Columbine massacre, please, PLEASE do not give a looney toon access to a gun!!
MISSING PERSON
*SERIOUS ALERT*
To those of the blogging world who are either my friends, family or from my area, this is an actual missing persons alert.
This is Mark Clarke. He has been missing for almost a week and his family is very worried. Since this photo was taken he has grown a scruffy beard and his hair is longer and he’s lost a bit of weight.
I’m used to seeing Mark around Town on a semi-regular basis. He is a supremely nice guy who’s been dealt a couple of crappy hands throughout his life. However, I formally met Mark a few years ago when we were both doing background work on Call Me Fitz (with Jason Priestley) and he is very polite, kind and talkative.
Unfortunately, Mark suffers from seizures and cannot always afford/doesn’t always take his medication. With the extremely cold weather we’ve been having the last week and the blizzard we’re under now we are hoping that Mark is somewhere warm and safe and that he hasn’t succumbed to a seizure and is out in the elements.
Please readers (from my area), if you have seen Mark since last Saturday, please contact the local police department and provide them with any information. If you’re my friend on Facebook please go to my homepage and share the links I’ve provided which included the above photos.
And for the rest of you, please pray that this man turns up safe and warm.
Thank you.
Game Over
Well, I gave you a week to come up with the answers for my movie quote game. You got some of them. Now I suppose it’s time to fill you in with the rest.
You guessed correctly:
1) Varsity Blues
3) Gone in 60 Seconds
7) Dazed and Confused
8) Buffy the Vampire Slayer
10) The Cutting Edge
WHAT WAS LEFT OVER:
2) Return to Me
4) Girl, Interrupted
5) Heathers
6) Kuffs
9) Clueless
11) School Ties
These are all good movies – that I have undoubtedly watched over and over…..AND OVER.
You should go check them out. They’re good movies. I promise. I wouldn’t lie to you.
Cheers.
My First Blogger Award
What a lovely surprise to get a message from my blogging friend, Gull over at The Magfique Way – http://themagfiqueway.wordpress.com/. She is one of my favorite bloggers…a kindred spirit of sorts…at least of the blogging world. And today she put a sincere smile on my face by presenting me with the Reader Appreciation Award.
http://themagfiqueway.wordpress.com/2013/02/05/reader-appreciation-award-i-feel-blessed/
She is so adorable. It made me so happy to get her message. I’ve been contributing to this blog for like, 8 years (tho some of the older stuff is LAME!), and this is my first award. And it was so out of the blue that I just didn’t even prepare a thank you speech or anything.
But fear not, dear friends, tho I am planning to reciprocate this award at some point (soon), I decided to leave you with something from my life…I debated on writing something humorous or something a little stronger, a little reflective of me. I went with the latter (for something funny go here: https://welcometosandyland.wordpress.com/2012/01/13/something-happened-on-the-way/).
So here is something personal…straight out of my journal from waaaay back when (c. 1999)…something that I’ve never shared with anyone.
“I continue to lie to myself, allowing myself to believe that if I don’t think about him he will be out of my mind. But even the mere mention of his name sends memories and tears flooding back. I haven’t seen him, physically, but he’s everywhere I go. Still.
I’ve compared us to Hamlet & Ophelia. They were in love; he was more wise of the world and she was naive and innocent. He had lied to her, told her he didn’t love her, and broke her heart. This drove her crazy and on the bring of her insanity she lost herself and lost her life. The tragedy of it all caused by those three little words. Those three little words that I don’t think I can ever say again.
Because of him I am powerless. I have no control. I shut my eyes but he is still there living in my head, laughing at my misery. And I am left alone and still loving him. I often wish that he would go away and I’d never see him again because that is easier than feeling the way I feel. Pretending that I don’t hurt is too hard.
I pray for him, every night, hoping that he gets his life together, that he’s okay, and that he knows I still love him. Because I do.”
Heavy or WHAT?? I know…the things a young girl writes after a break up.
Anyway, I shared that with you so that you can see that my inappropriate (at times) humor comes from a good place and often to overshadow the depressing stuff. It’s all good. I simply have found that, as a writer, most a lot of my creativity comes from a darker place…from circumstances that aren’t always the most uplifting. And when I write from this darker, sadder place the words usually just flow. And I have managed to turn out pretty good in spite of, eh?
So, thank you again, Dear Gull at The Magfique Way, for always being there with your great posts and comments and for this very special award. And to the rest of you: Thanks for reading.
Cheers!
Bye Bye Penny
Say Goodbye to the Canadian Penny.
For those of you non-Canadians (and Canadians living under a rock) today is the last day for the Penny. Well, technically, today is the last day the Canadian Mint (OMG does anyone else remember those ice cream bars?? YUM!)
Uh, yeah….what was I saying? Oh yes…today is the last day the Canadian Mint will distribute the Penny. This is kind of sad. Yes, yes, I too bitch about getting a bunch of pennies back in my change and having to dig and dig looking for a Quarter are turning up 16 bazillion Pennies.
But what am I gonna do now? How else am I going to get the lint out of my pockets?? It seems lint only ever turns up in a handful of Pennies.
Or, how are we going to pay for our Tim Horton’s coffee on those days we don’t have cash without counting out seven dollars in Pennies??
And how am I supposed to have continuous good luck if the Penny is gone?
And if I ever decided to start playing the lottery how on earth would I scratch of my tickets?? Nickels just don’t make the cut.
And, OMG, how EVER will I figure out what someone is thinking??
One good thing that the Mint is promoting with the end of the Penny is to donate them to charities. I think this a pretty generous idea. The Penny will still be in circulation and is going to continue to be legal tender…so why not donate them if you’re that eager to get them out of your household.
Anyway, I feel sad today. I hate saying goodbye. And who knows…maybe someday the Penny will be worth a whole lot more.
Cheers.
Having Faith Doesn’t Mean You Have Class
Thursday morning I read the following article on Yahoo.
http://news.yahoo.com/blogs/sideshow/pastor-tip-receipt-155914258.html
Yesterday morning I see this (connected) article:
http://ca.news.yahoo.com/blogs/sideshow/applebees-waitress-fired-pastor-receipt-193820748.html
So, the pastor went from anonymity to now making herself (because, in all honesty, I thought it was a man) known to the public and has gotten the poor waitress fired.
First of all, if you don’t agree with the gratuity (which really isn’t that bad seeing how it was a large party with a final bill of over $200) then speak with the waitress or a manager. Don’t leave a jackass kind of note on your receipt. AND…don’t add more insult by hiding behind your faith and stating that you are a Pastor. I take offense to that. First of all, Faith is something to be proud of and to be used to promote your religion not something to be used as a defence or a weapon. To state that you’re not going to provide a tip because you only give 10% to God (hey, shouldn’t HE get 100%???) is completely insulting and shows me right there that you’re just being a dick.
If your “heart is really broken,”and you feel you’ve “brought embarrassment to my church and ministry” then that’s a good sign that you’ve done something wrong. If you truly believed in what you were “preaching” you would feel no shame. Your church is embarrased of you because you made a mistake and acted like an ass. And instead of calling to complain (that you got called out) and resulting in that poor waitress being fired, what you should have done was call and apologize for not acting appropriately and following thru with the designated gratuity. And for leaving such a note. You know, I’ve left notes on receipts for people before….but they were good notes. I once left a note on my receipt apologizing for not having enough cash to leave a decent tip but praising her for such good service. Turned out that the waitress was a good friend of my good friend and she’d talked about the note for days. That was probably 13 or 14 years ago and we’re all friends now. (See? It’s the little things that count.) As one commenter posted; “If she believed what she was writing on the check, then she should stand by it. If she is now embarrassed, then maybe she wasn’t so convinced she was in the right. Maybe she was being a jerk and deserves whatever embarrassment she received.”
Having faith doesn’t mean you have class.
Cheers.