Flour Child (or Stupid Mistakes You Make When You’re 14)
When I was in junior high my friend, Becca had a no-parent-in-attendance sleepover. There were 4 of us girls in attendance: Becca, Me, Becky and Cate, but no parents. We were all pretty good kids, non-troublemakers, and our parents either trusted us or else we lied and said there would be parents. I can’t remember.
During our lame night of being 14 (Becca was 15) we watched movies, gossiped and ate junk food – typical for a sleepover in the 90’s. We had been prepared to make a pizza from scratch and veg out in front of the tube. So, we gathered in the kitchen, prepared our toppings and began mixing the dough. And then it started. Someone initiated a flour fight. Not a food fight, but a flour fight. And it got crazy. White powder was everywhere. We nutty little girls were covered in it…head to toe. Including in my eye. So, in a 14 year old semi-panic I feverishly began to flush the flour out. FLUSH. As in use water. Y’know what happens when flour and water mix? Obviously I was not thinking. Then I realized “Aw shit! I have dough in my eye.” It is thoroughly disgusting pulling long strings of dough out of one’s eye. And just when you think you’ve gotten it all out, two days later more strings of dough from deep under your eyeball will emerge and ooze out of your face.
So, note to all you 14 year old girls (or anyone who generally likes a good food fight), be sure not to include flour in your fight. And if you do include flour and it gets in your eye(s), be sure to not attempt to flush said flour from eye. Just maybe stand in front of a fan with your eyes taped open.